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By M. Arden Hauer, M.A., J.D.
Bradford Publishing
The award-winning Friendly Divorce Guidebook for Colorado is a “great” how-to manual for people who want to do their own divorce together, to be fair, and to avoid the hurt, anger, and misunderstanding usually associated with the adversarial process.
The Friendly Divorce Guidebook, by M. Arden Hauer of the Center for Non-Adversarial Divorce in Golden (Genesee), Colorado, helps you understand your options as well as your emotions.
It can help you through negotiations with each other, the decision-making process, separating, taking care of your children at a difficult time, paperwork, the legal process, taxes. It contains:
- Checklists of things to gather and do
- Examples of ways to divide your assets
- Tax information, how to save money
- Tips for creating your Parenting Plan and arranging child support
- Guidance for how to discuss maintenance (alimony)
- Sample Court forms with instructions
- A CD with fillable forms and a Sworn Financial Statement
that calculates for you.
- Sample wording for writing your own Separation Agreement.
Publication of the Friendly Divorce Guidebook for Colorado
Publication of the Friendly Divorce Guidebook for Colorado, 1st edition in 1995, was a milestone in putting into ordinary lay English, the explanation of the complex legal and tax issues involved in divorce.
“You don't have to be a lawyer to understand these things,” Hauer says. “I often find that once couples understand the law and how things work and why, they are much more able and ready to make agreements. It's easy to get into fear when you don't understand what's going on.”
Award
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Westword
Best of Denver
The Denver newspaper Westword awarded the Friendly Divorce Guidebook Best of Denver for “Best Directions to Splitsville.” “Assuming both partners are still speaking to each other, it's time to pick up a copy of . . . the . . . Friendly Divorce Guidebook for Colorado . . . an invaluable aid if you're planning on filing pro se [without attorneys], but also pretty handy if you just want to understand your lawyers. Breaking up is hard to do, but this book . . . makes it easier.”
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Comments and Reviews
"This is the clearest, most comprehensive and user friendly book I've ever seen about divorce."
--Diane Hartman
Director of Communications, Colorado Bar Association, The Docket
" ... (T)he Friendly Divorce Guidebook is extraordinarily complete and accurate - it's as if the reader has a lawyer, therapist, mediator and financial adviser at his or her side ..."
--Christine A. Coates, M. Ed, J.D.
"As Family Court Facilitator in the 1st Judicial District, I meet with thousands of couples each year who are going through a divorce "pro se" (without an attorney). When they ask about a helpful resource, I recommend the Friendly Divorce Guidebook for Colorado by Arden Hauer. Even if they choose to retain counsel, they will benefit by being more knowledgeable "consumers" of legal services. Armed with substantial knowledge about the issues and potential resolutions to the issues, they can minimize attorney's fees.
"It is a comprehensive guide to preparing your own divorce paperwork and resolving your legal issues, and is packed with practical advice and real life examples that help bring the process to life. It is a courageous book, which takes on even the toughest and most intricate issues."
--Samuel Benson, J.D.
Family Court Facilitator, Jefferson District Court, Colorado
Order your copy here. You can also purchase it at the Center: be sure to call ahead to arrange a time.
Table of Contents
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Friendly Divorce Guidebook for Colorado
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Table of Contents (detailed)
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Introduction
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Chapter 1
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The Initial Decision
How Do You Know if You Should Get a Divorce?
Options for the Marriage in Difficulty
Marriage Counseling
Marital Mediation
Physical Separation (Trial Separation)
Physical Separation Has Both Legal and Tax Consequences
Legal Separation
Annulment
Dissolution of Marriage (Divorce)
Common Law Marriage in Colorado
Your Other Divorces
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Chapter 2
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Divorce and the Legal System
The Court Aspect of Divorce – an Overview
A Word About the Law
How Do You Want to Conduct Your Divorce?
Divorce Process Options
Divorce Services and Consultants
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Chapter 3
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Taking Care of Yourself
Keeping Yourself Together So You Can Work Together
The Emotional Divorce Sequence
Staying Sane Under Insane Conditions
Being a Good Parent is Part of Taking Care of Yourself
How to Handle Potential Violence and Other Stressful Encounters
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Chapter 4
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Moving From One Household to Two
Moving From One Household to Two
Who Uses What and Who Pays for It
Children
The Budget Crunch
Temporary Support Between Spouses
Temporary Child Support
The Temporary Agreement
Sample Wording for Temporary Agreements
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Chapter 5
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The First Court Papers
Who May File in Colorado
When to File
What Happens When You File Your Petition?
Where to File
What Forms Do We Need?
Preparing Your Papers for the Court
The Petition
The Case Information Sheet
Jurisdiction
Notifying Your spouse/Service of Process
The Summons
Petitioner's Verified Motion and Order for Publication
The Response
Setting the Initial Status Conference
What if You and/or Your Spouse Have a Change of Heart?
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Chapter 6
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Gathering Information, Preparing Sworn Financial Statements,
and Mandatory Disclosures
Information about Income
Your Monthly Budget
Unsecured Debt
Assets
The Sworn Financial Statements
Mandatory Disclosures
About the Status Conference
Where Do We Go From Here?
One More Thing
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Chapter 7
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Assets and Debts
Separation Agreement – Part I
Introduction to the Separation Agreement
Assets – Marital and Separate
Valuing Your Assets
Kinds of Assets
Kinds of Debts
Dealing with Debt
Dividing Marital Assets and Debts
Finalizing Your Division
Making Things Happen: Enforcement
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Chapter 8
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Children
Separation Agreement – Part II
Who is a Child?
How to Be a Good Parent Through the Divorce Process
Parental Responsibility Law
Who Will Make the Decisions Regarding Issues that Affect the Children?
Where Will the Children Live?
Developing Your Parenting Schedule
How to Tell the Children
Odds and Ends
Teeth
Anticipating changes
Where Do We Go From Here?
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Chapter 9
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Child Support
Separation Agreement – Part III
The Colorado Child Support Guideline
Children's Expenses
Extraordinary Expenses of Your Children
Organizing Parents' Income and Children's Expenses
Schedule of Basic Child Support Obligations
Deviations: What if the Recommended Support is Too High or Too Low for You?
Post-Secondary Education
Life Insurance and Other Security for Child Support
Teeth for Your Child Support Agreement
Conclusion
Definitions of Income
Schedule of Basic Child Support Obligations
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Chapter 10
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Maintenance (Alimony)
Separation Agreement – Part IV
Maintenance (Alimony)
Smart Maintenance
IRS Maintenance Rules
Putting Your Maintenance Plan Together
Conclusion
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Chapter 11
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Taxes
Separation Agreement – Part V
The Tax Effects of Divorce
Tax Filing Status
Tax Exemptions
Tax Deductions
Tax Credits
Estimate Your Taxes
Maintenance Recapture
Conclusion
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Chapter 12
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The Final Court Papers
The Final Court Papers
The Caption
Sample Wording for Your Separation Agreement
The Support Order
Income Withholding for Support and Insurance
Notice to Withhold Income for Support
Notice to Employer to Deduct for Health Insurance
Decree of Dissolution of Marriage or Legal Separation
Divorce by Affidavit: Affidavit for Decree Without Appearance of Parties
Getting Your Case Set for a Hearing
What to Do if the Court Does Not Sign Your Decree
Copies of Your Decree
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Chapter 13
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Finishing Up
Transfers of Title
Changing Your Name
Changing Your Address
Calendaring Later Events
Checking Your Credit Ratings
Converting from Legal Separation to Dissolution of Marriage
Making Things Happen: Enforcement
Can We Change Our Agreement After the Court Approves It?
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Onward
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Bibliography
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LIst of Forms
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Checklists
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List of Examples
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Index
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M. Arden Hauer, M.A., J.D.
Center for Non-Adversarial Divorce
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603 Park Point Drive, Suite 120
(I-70 at Genesee Park)
Golden, CO 80401-5736
Map and Directions
Phone: (303) 526-7749
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At the Center for Non-Adversarial Divorce in Colorado, we provide friendly divorce mediation with property and debt division, parenting plans, child support and maintenance (alimony) plans for couples throughout the Front Range and the Denver Metro area, including communities such as Genesee, Golden, Evergreen, Arvada, Lakewood, Boulder, Westminster, Broomfield, Thornton, Northglenn, Louisville, Lafayette, Aurora, Highlands Ranch, Greenwood Village, the Denver Tech Center, Englewood, Littleton, Centennial, Lone Tree, Elizabeth, Parker, Conifer, Granby, and counties including Jefferson County, Denver County, Boulder County, Broomfield County, Arapahoe County, Douglas County, Elbert County, Park County, and Summit County.
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